Ratchetness - You May Be Ratchet Examples

You may be considered "RATCHET" if

(written by Benita Blocker)

1. You creep into the guestroom in the middle of the night where your wife's best friend is visiting and sleeping. 
2. You ask your mother not to mention to your new spouse that you have children in the plural tense plus you owe back child support.
3. You pick up another woman for a date in your girlfriend's new BMW that she bought for herself.
4. You pick up another man for a date in your boyfriend's new Jaguar that he just bought for you.
5. You tell a date that you burnt your lip drinking coffee when you know it is a cold sore/fever blister, and you still want a kiss on the lips.
6. You take a soiled condom out of the trash to impregnate yourself.
7. You email another woman's boss in an attempt to get her fired because you want her husband.
8. You write a nasty letter to a different Greek organization urging them to drop one of their pledgees.
9. You are dating two different women that live in the same college dormitory, and you pick up one from the front entrance and pick the other one up from the back entrance.
10. You call a man's wife to let her know that you are the new fiancee before the divorce is final.
11. You wearing a speedo, and you can not even see your feet.
12. You have your fellow HOA Board member arrested for aggravated assault and battery when you have NO visible signs of physical bodily injury. You also convince another member to bear false witness of the account.
13. You lost count of how many of the children that you fathered that are in foster care.

In addition, you are ratchet if you are guilty of 

rape, 

molestation, 

domestic violence, 

or incest.

Any questions about whether or not any of these circumstances are ratchet, 

then you may be ratchet.